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08 November, 2011

Help! I'm Addicted to my Vibrator!


This is something that I heard somewhere - that by masturbating with toys, women can become dependent on their vibrators in order to have an orgasm, leaving sex with just their partners unsatisfying. And since then, it's been at the back of my mind - could this be true?? I mean, orgasms - for me - are much more intense with something soft and vibratey against my clitoris than with merely a tongue or a finger, but does this mean I am slowly becoming addicted to Ol' Faithful? That vibrators are to women as the "death grip" is to men??


I've mostly just pushed this notion into the back of my mind and figured that if it were true, I was in the pre-addiction stage at worse.

Because after all, as much as I love the "off-nights" away from my guy where Ol' Faithful and I get to spend some quality time together, I still crave the "on-nights" full of kisses, cuddles, sexy time and silliness.

But the orgasms - for me - are different during solo sex than with a partner. More intense, in a sense yes, but lacking the holistic experience of emotions, tangled hair and sheets, sweat, and oh right - another human being there to share it with.

And until I came across an old Dr. Trina Read [AKA Super-Awesome Sexologist from Saskatchewan and kinda my hero] podcast, I thought that because my orgasms weren't as intense with a partner than without, I was maybe becoming a vibrator junkie. But, because I'm not actually an expert, and she is, I worry no longer!

"When you take a vibrator and put it on any part of the skin, what is does is it brings blood to the surface, making that area of the skin a lot more sensitive. So when a male or female uses a vibrator to achieve an orgasm, the orgasm will be a lot more intense than when it's done just using fingers or other body parts."
 And further on...
"No, you can't become dependent on sex toys. They make sex more fun and you will experience a stronger orgasm because of a vibrator, but you know what? ... a vibrator can't cuddle with you..."

So no wonder! I'm not doing anything wrong/detrimental to my sex life. Ol' Faithful is not the metaphorical "death grip" to my clitoris, and those that insist on perpetuating that myth are likely just some douche-bag guys who are threatened by the fact that women can get off without their manly manhoods, or something like that.

So ladies [and gents], with fresh batteries and this comforting knowledge in my arsenal, I bid you adieu. I've got a whole "off-night" to occupy myself. ;)

~A